Frequently asked questions:

Q: You guys haven’t thought of a less-clunky name yet?
A: No. We meant to, at first, but his has been the working title for over two years now, and we're stuck with it.

Q: Does it cost anything to play?
A: $5 per person. This covers snowballs and field rental.

Q: What gear do I need?
A: CTFSF is a highly specialized game that requires iron wills, livers, and crotches. Only the strong survive, and in a few cases, even the strong have been broken. Here’s what you should bring to increase your chances of staying alive:

Q: He cheated!
A: Cheating, while not actively encouraged, is kind of permissible. Keep in mind that almost everyone will be drunk by game two, and will be hyper-competitive, stupid, rowdy, and unable to focus on silly details like “The Rules.” Remember that if you're caught cheating, everyone'll think you're an asshole. Also, we've found that the people doing the accusing are usually cheating pretty intensely themselves (see the oft cited case of Smelt It v. Dealt It).

Q: But he cheated, and then his team won!
A: What do you want, blood? Tattling simply frustrates the (probably also drunk) umpires. If they see the cheat, they’ll send the cheater to prison. Keep in mind that you aren’t competing for money. You are competing for the glory of victory. Gen. Patton never accused the enemy of cheating. Neither did Napoleon, Sun Tzu, or Constantine.

Q: But…!
A: No. It'll be aiight.

Q: I am made entirely of glass, and I’m afraid that if I attend I’ll get damaged! Can I come even if I don’t want to play?
A: Absolutely. We at CTFSF understand that millions of Americans suffer with this disease, and we are more than happy to facilitate your fragility. There are any number of roles that virtually guarantee that you will not suffer injury, including (but not limited to):

Q: I’ve heard whisperings of CTFSF going league. Is there any truth to those rumors?
A: Not really. We’re not entirely sure how to begin to organize a league around a game with constantly evolving rules and drunken hordes, but if anyone has any ideas, let us know. It could rule, but we kinda dig the relaxed pick-up quality we’ve got goin’ on.

Q: Do I have to RSVP?
A: Please do. RSVPing makes life easier for everyone, as we try to organize teams beforehand and need to have an idea of how many people will show up. This saves you from having to relive the nightmare of "picking teams." Remeber how much that sucked?

Q: Can I bring a friend/a bunch of friends?
A: Please do. Just make sure we know how many there will be before you show up. We need to assign your crew members team colors.

Q: Can I be on the same team as my boyfriend/girlfriend?
A: We try to split couples and friends up for two reasons:

• You’re never as vicious as you are when making war against a loved one, and
• There’s no time for coochy-coo bullshit.

Q: What’s the field like?
A: We rent out the whole of Doughboy Meadow for this event. About two-thirds of the terrain is open field, and the remaining third is somewhat wooded. Sometimes there are mudpits. Doughboy has no tables, BBQ grills, or bathrooms, but it is ours.

Q: How do I get to Doughboy Meadow?
A: Doughboy Meadow is located in the middle of beautiful Golden Gate Park. Directions to the field can be found by following these directions:

1. Get to Fulton
2.Take the 5 Fulton Bus or drive up Fulton going west (towards the beach)
3. Left on 8th Avenue
4. Right on JFK Drive
5. You will pass the following on your way to Doughboy Meadow: the de Young Museum on the left, Rose Garden on the right, and the Willis Polk Rock on the left.
6. Doughboy Meadow is going to be on your right. You will see the Doughboy Statue. Kneel before it.

Q: How can I help?
A: CTFSF accepts booze, snowballs, and cash money. Also, we usually make a mess, and we ask that participants help with cleanup, even if it's just making sure they leave with what they brought.